You still cross my mind from time to time.  Even though we never met and I never touched you, I still feel a bond.  As each christmas passes, I think of you. You know, you would have been two years old this past year.  I'm sure you would have hated your birthday because you would have been born close to christmas. 

I wonder what you would have looked like.  Would you have had his lips and my blue eyes?  Would you have my fair skin kissed with freckles or his light skin that easily tanned?  Would you have been a girl or a boy? I'll never know, but I will always wonder. 

I think sometimes, you don't have to meet someone to know you love them.  I know this because of you.

I know that we will get our second chance to meet again and until we do, I will always think of you.

So... I am severely not ready to go back to school.  I am terrified at the thought actually.  I know that this year is going to be completely different and I am so afraid of F*cking up big time.  I fear if I do.. I don't know what I will do because the person who I would talk to about it.. is no longer there.  I thought having the summer.. it would put things into perspecitve... but really.. it just put off dealing with the hard stuff.. and here... I find myself looking at all the things I am not ready to face.

So it's been a while since I have up dated...... but I have been busy and too tired to update.

Anywho, I went to chicago a couple of weekends ago and had one hell of a time.  It was a girls night out on the town... celebrating Jill's B-day, and summer, and  our new apartment.  We went to the Celtic Crown. I went to the bar to get a drink and a guy came and sat next to me while I was waiting.  He started chatting with me and I was alright with that, it was all good until he started to invade my personal bubble.  He kept scooting closer and closer to me... and that just didnt' fly with me. So he was Scooter for the rest of the night.  Then DJ mike came and sat down next to me while Jill and Ro were at in the Banjo.  He was trying to get me to sing on the karaoke... and I said no.. but I promised him my friends would. 

Now when Jill and Ro cam back from the bathroom... Ro said something to the DJ and the called me up to sing... which I didn't want to.. because I am shy.. I only sing in the shower people!  I went to tell him no.. but he gave a mike to me and made me sing anyways.  Then random people kept coming up to me and pushing the mike closer to the mouth. I'll get Ro and Jill back eventually.

When we were driving to the next place.. there was an angrry man in the car next to us.. he was screaming and swurving towards Ro's car.. we have no clue why he was mad... but Jill eventullly gave him the finger.. I'm sure that didn't help...

To shorten it up.. twas a good night in Chicago.

Since then, I have pretty much been babysitting... I know... lame.  But my girls leave next week.. so I am out of a job... boo hoo.  I'll miss them though.. even though they have inspired me to get my tubes tied.....  I will kinda miss them when they are gone.  However I will not miss watching Dora the explorer, Sponge Bob Square Pants, Lizzy McGuire.... nd so on.... but they did watch the doodle bops.. and it was a bit amusing.....( I can't believe I admitted that... ha ha ha.)  They told a knock knock joke... it kinda made me laugh a little.

Knock Knock

Who's there?

Snow

Snow who?

 

Snow one but me.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha......

Yeah.... I'm lame...

 

Anywho, I went out with an old friend yesterday.  It was great to get back in touch with her.  I can't wait till she has her baby.  Erica, Mere, and I went to TGIFriday's were everyday is friday.... so they claim... then went around the mall.  Was a good time with old friends... how I missed them so.

Today I cleaned out the kitchen to steal... I mean borrow pans and other such items for my new apartment.  I bought a new dish set and double laundry seperator... I was exited.  I go to Northern tomorrow to pay my tuition and to pay my rent.  Then on wensday I move in.. Woot!  But I am moving in by myself... but I usually do anyways.. because I am a strong, independant woman who relies on no one.....

Anyways... if you want to help... your help is more than welcomed.. if not... well... thats okay to

I have some stuff to take care of so I guess this is it for now.

 

Lata